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Friday, September 27, 2013

Memories of Halloween Past: Raisin Creme Pies and Other Such Halloween Non-Treats

It seems like just yesterday- the anticipation of waiting for Halloween night to roll around, coming home quickly to change into my carefully planned costume, eating a quick dinner, and then hitting the streets of our small town to scavenge for candy and other Halloween treats, with my sisters by my side.  Oh, those were the days.  We grew up loving Halloween.  It was a magical night of sugar overload, and back before parents worried quite so much about cavities.  

But inevitably, there were always a few "non-treats" that made their way into my bag, as I recall. Surely, I'm not alone.  Don't you remember the disappointment over, let's say, a box of raisins?  I mean WHO GIVES OUT RAISINS for Halloween?!?!?  I mean just look at these kids.  I'm sure they were paid handsomely - IN CHOCOLATE- to even be associated with this ad.  At least two of the three kids are masked to protect their identities.  But, I'm sure that little witch never lived down her role in this unforgivable Halloween endorsement for raisins. 


In fact, any derivative of raisins should be strictly outlawed- for Halloween, that is.  Raisinets really don't count as a "treat".  Yes, they are technically covered in chocolate, but no amount of chocolate can really make up for what lurks inside.  

But there was nothing as frightening on Halloween night as opening your treat bag to discover a Little Debbie Raisin Creme Pie.  It happened every year when I was growing up.  I'm sure these non-treats must have been coming from the same house each year, though I don't know that we ever quite figured out which one, or else we would have undoubtedly stopped hitting that house.  

I was actually relaying this story to my husband this past weekend, and he admitted that he had never even heard of a Raisin Creme Pie. What???  How can this be?  I thought everyone had to contend with the likes of this raisin cake each year.  So I tried to describe it for him.  It was a soft plain "cake", filled with white cream, and then topped with raisins.  Ick.  

Just as we finished talking about it, we ran into a store to pick up a couple of things, and I happened to see them out of the corner of my eye.  I was floored.  I haven't seen those things in YEARS, and I certainly didn't think they even still made Raisin Creme Pies!   Oh, Little Debbie, how could you? Shame on you. For the love of all that is good and decent, those things should have been retired many moons ago.  Did I buy a box for old time's sake?  Heck no!  I know those things haven't improved over the years.  But we did get a picture to commemorate this trip down memory lane.  


As for other Halloween "non-treats", this little list rounds out my list of "don'ts" for Halloween night. 
  • Apples- I'm not talking candy caramel apples- just plain ones from the produce section of the grocery store.  That, or any other piece of fruit, really. 
  • Mary Janes
  • Bit O' Honey
  • Those awful orange and black wrapped hard as a rock chewy candies.  What were those things anyway?
  • Butterscotch candies
  • Peppermint candies
  • Tootsie rolls
Let's face it.  Halloween only comes once a year.  Do your neighborhood kids a favor, and either pass out chocolate bars, or leave the lights out and let them skip on to someone who will.  This concludes this Halloween public service announcement.  Carry on. 

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